Friday, June 22, 2012

My Breastfeeding Journey - Part 3

Dah lama tak cerita pasal breastfeeding kan? Alhamdulillah, setakat ini Ammar Yusuf masih lagi fully breastfeed walaupun kadang-kadang ada naik turunnya. Oh, sebelum itu, perlu difahamkan bahawa fully breastfeed dan exclusive breastfeeding adalah dua perkara yang berbeza ya. Ramai yang terlompat bila aku cakap anak aku fully breastfeed, like, "Kau tak bagi anak kau makan lagi ke??"

Exclusive breastfeed = Anak minum susu ibu dan hanya susu ibu sahaja tanpa sebarang makanan pelengkap lain. Ada ibu yang berjaya dan boleh exclusively breastfed anaknya selama 2 tahun TANPA sebarang makanan tambahan, mungkin sebab mampu nak cope with the demand, atau mungkin disebabkan anak memang tak suka/tak boleh terima makanan lain.

Fully breastfeed =  Anak minum susu ibu dan ada ambil makanan pelengkap juga. Means, walaupun dah start makan, anak masih tetap minum susu ibu, sehinggalah 2 tahun.

Recently, aku mengalami kemerosotan susu yang sangat menggila. Segalanya bermula sejak Ammar Yusuf warded hari itu. Mungkin disebabkan keadaan emosi aku yang sangat terganggu ketika itu, dan sebab yang lebih besar adalah sepanjang seminggu Ammar Yusuf di dalam wad, aku langsung tak pam. Direct feeding semata. Tu pun tak kerap mana, sebab Ammar Yusuf banyak tidur je masa tu. Dah keluar wad, aku terus ganti puasa straight berturut-turut pula. Masa tu aku ada 20 hari tau nak ganti!

Akibatnya, instead of 6-7oz sekali pam, aku hanya dapat 3oz sahaja. I've done Power Pumping berhari-hari, I've done eating a lot of heavy meals, I have done pump in schedule, I've done trying several milk boosters (kurma, horlicks, etc). Like seriously, it broke my heart. Maybe because I was too stress out, too tense sebab kena bangun malam semula untuk pam susu macam dulu-dulu. Sepanjang waktu aku bekerja Ammar Yusuf consume minimum 15oz (sebab dia kuat makan!), tu pun kami kena balik on time sebab usually last feeding session dia at around 5pm so ngam-ngam la kalau ambil dia at 6pm, terus direct feeding je.

Until one day, kami ambil dia a bit lewat (sebab pergi pasar malam), tapi lewat 10-15 minit je pun. Nampak dia macam lapar semacam je. Sampai berbunyi dia hisap jari. Rupanya hari tu dia kurang tidur so kerap menyusu, maka last session dia pukul 3pm. Kesian sangat. Even dah makan pun, Ammar Yusuf tetap perlukan susu kalau tak dia macam tak senang duduk tak boleh tidur. Sedih sangat masa tu.. So malam tu, sepanjang malam aku fikir, mungkin dah nak kena bagi susu formula dah ni. I feel like a selfish mother, hanya kerana obsess nak bagi susu ibu semata-mata sampai sanggup biar anak kelaparan. Am I a bad mother? Like formula milk is something poisonous, like it's something too disgusting. I started Googling, rupanya bukan semua bayi boleh adapt dengan susu formula ni, ada yang lactose intolerance lah, allergic lah. Susu yang diproses dari tetek lembu kan. Adoi, macam-macam hal la pula nak kena fikir. Emosi sangat-sangat. Esoknya, menangis dalam kereta pula dengan Suami tercinta, feeling like a failure, a fail mother. Barulah aku faham perasaan ibu-ibu yang nak sangat bagi susu ibu untuk anaknya tapi tak mampu nak bagi. Terganggu betul perasaan aku.

Suami pun bersuara, "Tak apalah, mungkin setakat itu je rezeki Ammar Yusuf. B dah usaha bagi yang terbaik kan. Kita cuba susu formula la k. Daripada B sedih-sedih macam ni. Afterall, bukan terus stop breastfeed pun kan, just topup in case tak cukup je kan.."

So I begin to search for the best formula milk, asking around friends and family, baca forum-forum, but couldn't help being skeptical when people say this type of milk is the best, this type of milk can make babies develop faster, this type of milk have more DHA so baby will become more intelligent and stronger blablabla, because deep inside, I know.. I strongly believed, that nothing can beat the miracle of mother's milk.

After doing some evaluation, we finally opt for Enfalac A+. Sebab susu ini yang paling highly recommended and paling kurang negative feedbacks. And of course, very pricey :/ The next morning, macam biasa I bagi bekalan breastmilk Ammar Yusuf (still 15oz), thermos makanan, and with full of hesitation, susu tepung. Berulang-ulang kali aku cakap dengan Kak Ha, bagi Ammar Yusuf hanya kalau bekalan susu ibu dah habis dan dia dah perlukan susu.

Well, to be perfectly honest, the thing about providing a formula milk as back up is, I can have a peace of mind at work :) Aku rasa lebih tenang, sebab dah tak perlu nak terfikir-fikir anak cukup susu ke tidak, even kalau balik rumah jalan jem teruk pun (antara punca stress), aku masih bertenang tak perlu nak marah-marah dan risau anak tak cukup susu, because worst come to worst, there's always formula milk. Maka aku jadi lebih gembira, kurang stress.. I keep eating the right foods, eat a load (as usual), avoiding cold/carbonated drinks, makan calcium/vitamin C and guess what? I begin to produce more milk just like before! So Ammar Yusuf tak perlu minum susu formula pun sebenarnya! In fact, semalam masa ambil dia siap ada extra sebotol breastmilk dia belum minum. Sejak beli susu formula hari tu, dia sempat guna 3 scoops je kot, lepas tu langsung tak terusik dah HEHE kesian Daddy beli mahal-mahal. Tapi once dah buka package susu tu, kena habiskan in 1 month kan? Tak apalah, Mummy guna untuk campur dalam oat je nanti ;)

That's about it. My keywords for continously producing breastmilk are still the same as my previous posts on breastfeeding; makan banyak, makan makanan yang betul, elakkan makanan/minuman yang tak elok, hati kena sentiasa tenang, HATI MESTI KENA HAPPY! Dan yang paling penting, yakinlah dengan rezeki Allah. Semoga semuanya dipermudahkan untuk kita semua, inshaAllah.

My heroes. My reasons for living :')






13 comments:

Nur Aqilah said...

:')enjoy bce entry mcm ni..dpt knowledge utk diri sndiri next year.insya'allah..

My SouL and My HearT said...

sama kes macam saya.Last 2 weeks, iyyad pun masuk wad.Berkampung 3 hari 2 malam kat ward. of course la tak pam dan bagi Df je. Masuk kerja hari isnin, sekali pam..memang la dapat 2.5-3oz utk kedua-dua belah B.
Memang la saya sedih. Cuba try macam2..tenangkan diri time pam..tapi still dapat macam tu jugak.
Sampai seminggu juga la hasil tuaian dapat macam tu. Masuk minggu ni...Alhamdulillah..back to normal.

Anonymous said...

Sama la una ngan kita huhu..rasa cam bersalah sgt bila org nursery bgtahu ebm tak cukup smpai satu tahap suri rebut susu kwn dia pastu minum smpai habis huhu..started lps cuti aritu mmg topup ngan fm sbbnya stock tade langsung, first time anta fm punya la rasa bersalah sgt kt suri..tp husband comfort kan kita, dia ckp tapela suri dh besar so mmg kena minum lebih lgpun it wont harm her klu minum fm..kt nursery dia minum 2kali pastu klu kt umah mmg df jeh..tp sbb susu kurang so dia makin kerap bf tp kejap2..kdg2 bila bagi dia fm kan nmpak dia happy sgt sbb kenyang.
Tapelah janji dia happy & membesar dgn sihat kan..syukurlah AY still fully bf :))

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Husna Hadzarami said...

Thank you! Deliver next year eh? Take care! =)

Husna Hadzarami said...

Oh yeke? Is he okay now? Sedih kan anak masuk wad ni :(

Anyway good for you. Boleh lagi bertenang. Tapi kadang-kadang susu merudum ni ada masa-masa dia kan, kalau kita tak give up, teruskan pumping + Power Pumping, after a week inshaAllah boleh back to normal.

Husna Hadzarami said...

Waaa garangnya Suri siap rebut susu kawan minum sampai habis!! HAHA don't mess with her. True, macam kita tulis tu, kadang-kadang I feel like my obsession towards breastfeeding clouds my judgment. Tak apalah, asalkan dapat exlusive 6 bulan kan Alhamdulillah dah. Suri pun dah setahun pun, Is bukan stop terus kan? Keep on supplying la, inshaAllah susu takkan putus up to 2 years :)

Anonymous said...

Hahaa itulah tp i cam ternganga jap bila akak nursery tu ckp dia minum smpai abis..dia kata nak amik blk tp suri mengamuk huhu owh anakku
Skrg masih lg df just tak pump dah sbb suri pun bkn nk minum klu yg frozen..bila dh tak pump ni kdg2 rasala bengkak so bila suri bf nampakla cam dia kenyang ckit, mlm2 pun mmg dia crk mommy hehe..tp risau gak bila dh tak pump nnt susu makin tade tp hrp2 sgt suri leh bf smpai 2yo..dpt fully 1yo pun dh bersyukur sgt dah :)
Dont worry una, kdg2 sbb kita byk membc sana sini tu yg jd risau semcm kan..its in our blood that we always want the best for our baby..just keep praying k :)

Hannah Johary said...

Hi Husna, have been reading your blog for quite a while now and I love it to bits!

As for this entry, I have to agree with you, happiness is still the number 1. Same here, saya pun still exclusively breastfeeding my daughter. Ada masa pasang surut. And bila surut, memang menggagau buat power pumping, makan / minum macam-macam, and bila pump tengok susu keluar setitik-setitik, I always ask myself why why why? Apa yang silap?

Rupanya time stress tu, diri sendiri panic dan dah jadi bertambah stress. So macam mana susu nak keluar, kan? ;)

So now I learn to take things easy too. And susu memang melimpah during weekends like this when I go out jalan-jalan, spend time with family and friends. Time tak kerja! Hihi. Memang diri kena happy.

Sorry for the long comment. Dah macam blog entry pula. Again, I love your blog. Keep on writing, ok! :D

YanaHime said...

at least una dpt jgk bg sampai skrg...akak cuma dpt bg sampai 3 bln jer...pastu susu merudum tambah plak dgn keadaan keja yg tak mengizinkan...mmg rasa frust sgt tp terima seadanya rezeki anak sampai situ jer....

Husna Hadzarami said...

Hi! Heee segannya, thanks for reading!

That's why, people always advise to not being panic when the production drops, but the panic itself happened because of that! Eh faham kan? Anyway this is not the first time it happens to me, before this pernah juga alami macam ni, but after several efforts, it works tanpa perlu beli FM pun, but this time macam chronic gila :(

Anyway I just read your blog too, yours is nice too! Keep on writing ok! =)

Husna Hadzarami said...

Ala please do not get demotivated :( You must have try hard kan before? Next baby boleh cuba lagi k :)

fana said...

so true.spot on! we're definitely on the same page here...hihi
i ade share my bf journey n yes, sometimes kite kena tahu yg IT IS OK to feed our bb fm, especially time susu merudum.so we wont get too stressed out over it.and it works for me.skrg dh boleh start keep stock blk....alhamdulillah....